A moment ago, I was shedding tears, not physically.
I didn't literally cry, but something inside my was crying.
My heart, my soul, and my spirit was crying.
They were crying out to me.
I don't know how to explain it, but I heard it.
I was deeply convicted of my own sins by the Holy Spirit.
When I was convicted, I saw Jesus, His supremacy.
I saw Jesus for who He is.
I saw Him, in spirit.
Through His words and they became flesh, and more real.
Am I reflecting on His words?
Am I living out my life according to His words?
Knowing God is not only about reading His words.
The Scripture has to be real in our own personal life.
How utterly foolish I am.
I lost sight of God for just few days because I was so busy with school that I didn't even both investing my time to spend with Him.
However, I still remember that He is always there beside me, telling me to He is there.
There is the difference between knowing that He is here, and Him telling me that He is there.
One word can describe it: Focus.
I didn't go to John Piper's Conference that was held at Willingdon Church.
I simply "borrowed" that word and used it as my title.
I was listening to one of the Willingdon church's conference called "reFocus".
However, that video or the sermon was THREE YEARS AGO.
The speaker was Mark Driscoll.
That dude has great things to share.
How I began to respond to his message is when he mentioned about Men.
As always, he targets the men.
There needs to be men in the church who can lead.
However, we are lacking men to be leaders and role models for the church.
When he was talking about men, he was talking to ME.
Long story short, I began to ponder again about my masculinity.
Am I a man, or am I still a little boy?
Honestly, my response was just half-and-half, but that is not what God wants me to be.
He doesn't want me to be double-minded.
It is either I am a man, or I am a little boy.
I still act kind of immature, which is alright from time to time.
I don't have a part-time job to support myself.
I rely on the student loan that the government lends me, but I still have to pay them back.
In the future, if I don't have a job, I am screwed.
If I am screwed that I don't have a job, then.......
She will be dying...She will be discouraged...She will be suffering...
All because of me...for being lazy.
I spending has reached to its highest point that I am going overboard...WAY overboard.
God will come to me and discipline me for destroying and wrecking His daughter...and His provisions.
He already shot me in the head.
I was deeply convicted.
I prayed for a while and get myself right with God again.
Be a man.
That is what I want to become.
A Godly man for a Godly woman.
A Godly man who loves and obeys the Lord.
He is gracious and compassionate to me, even though I screwed up billions of times, He is still merciful and forgiving.
Holy Spirit sanctify me.
Jill asked me to change my blog into WordPress so she would comment on it.
I was debating with myself for a while if I should switch over.
Looking back to my entries, a lot of things happened.
I can never imagine myself having a long story about myself and what God has been teaching me.
Perhaps, I will read it over again and laugh at myself.
Alright.
I will switch over to WordPress and try something new.
I'll let everyone an opportunity to post on my blog and say whatever they want to say even though they don't have an account.
I'll let you know about my new account.
I didn't literally cry, but something inside my was crying.
My heart, my soul, and my spirit was crying.
They were crying out to me.
I don't know how to explain it, but I heard it.
I was deeply convicted of my own sins by the Holy Spirit.
When I was convicted, I saw Jesus, His supremacy.
I saw Jesus for who He is.
I saw Him, in spirit.
Through His words and they became flesh, and more real.
Am I reflecting on His words?
Am I living out my life according to His words?
Knowing God is not only about reading His words.
The Scripture has to be real in our own personal life.
How utterly foolish I am.
I lost sight of God for just few days because I was so busy with school that I didn't even both investing my time to spend with Him.
However, I still remember that He is always there beside me, telling me to He is there.
There is the difference between knowing that He is here, and Him telling me that He is there.
One word can describe it: Focus.
I didn't go to John Piper's Conference that was held at Willingdon Church.
I simply "borrowed" that word and used it as my title.
I was listening to one of the Willingdon church's conference called "reFocus".
However, that video or the sermon was THREE YEARS AGO.
The speaker was Mark Driscoll.
That dude has great things to share.
How I began to respond to his message is when he mentioned about Men.
As always, he targets the men.
There needs to be men in the church who can lead.
However, we are lacking men to be leaders and role models for the church.
When he was talking about men, he was talking to ME.
Long story short, I began to ponder again about my masculinity.
Am I a man, or am I still a little boy?
Honestly, my response was just half-and-half, but that is not what God wants me to be.
He doesn't want me to be double-minded.
It is either I am a man, or I am a little boy.
I still act kind of immature, which is alright from time to time.
I don't have a part-time job to support myself.
I rely on the student loan that the government lends me, but I still have to pay them back.
In the future, if I don't have a job, I am screwed.
If I am screwed that I don't have a job, then.......
She will be dying...She will be discouraged...She will be suffering...
All because of me...for being lazy.
I spending has reached to its highest point that I am going overboard...WAY overboard.
God will come to me and discipline me for destroying and wrecking His daughter...and His provisions.
He already shot me in the head.
I was deeply convicted.
I prayed for a while and get myself right with God again.
Be a man.
That is what I want to become.
A Godly man for a Godly woman.
A Godly man who loves and obeys the Lord.
He is gracious and compassionate to me, even though I screwed up billions of times, He is still merciful and forgiving.
Holy Spirit sanctify me.
Jill asked me to change my blog into WordPress so she would comment on it.
I was debating with myself for a while if I should switch over.
Looking back to my entries, a lot of things happened.
I can never imagine myself having a long story about myself and what God has been teaching me.
Perhaps, I will read it over again and laugh at myself.
Alright.
I will switch over to WordPress and try something new.
I'll let everyone an opportunity to post on my blog and say whatever they want to say even though they don't have an account.
I'll let you know about my new account.
you shoudl use blogspot. it has more functions than wordpress.you can link ur gmail account to it.great post. im feeling something like that too rihgt now.no wonder why sloth/lazy is a sin.i'll pray for you... when i feel more motivatedpray for me too.
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